Current life update 1-29-2020

Right now I am at work thinking about my life in general. I have just returned to work from my maternity leave and it is going extremely difficult for me because I have to wake up at night to feed the babies every 3 to 4 hours and then come to work in the morning then when I go back from home, I immediately start taking care of all three kids again. It became a circle of life for me 24 hours and I am so tired. Lack of sleep definitely is not helping either. It drains all my energy and I am always so sleepy. I can go and on how hard my life is right now but despite all that, I am so grateful to Allah that I have my children and a loving husband who helps me a lot. Allah gave me everything I have ever wanted and that is a big blessing. Sometimes I am scared all these might be taken away from me if I blink because if something too good going on, something worst might be coming on my way which may hurt a lot more than I would be able to handle. I pray to Allah that it doesn't happen to me. Anyway, so we hired a nanny for Rehan because it is hard to take care of three kids at once. We sent him to day care which he hated and after a week later, day care kicked him out so we ended up hiring a nanny for him who comes to our house 3/4 days a week from morning to evening. My mother in law takes care of the twins when we both are at work and that is just one day a week because we work from home 4 days a week. Either Makid or I stay home and take care of the babies while do our job. She still gets tired of taking care of the twins and always looks so grumpy and tired. I know it is hard to take care of babies but she doesn't have anything else to do besides that anyway. Oh well! can't complain since it is not her responsibility to take care of our kids. We are glad at least she is here.